We all have a skeleton in their closet but not everyone is proud to share them. For some, they would go down the tomb with them, while others could decide to share them for the good of others. Sally, a professor and social advocate for the reproductive health rights of women and girls, chose the latter. A mother of four children of 38 years of age, Sally is very dear in her community because of the works she does.
Infact, as a child, parents used her as an example to their kids.
“Can’t you be like Sally, who is very decent,” many parents told their children. Little did they know that Sally was not totally a saint.
Many years later, Sally decided to share her secret with her 18-year old daughter, who respects her so much and considers her to be her best friend. According to Sally, she wants her daughter to grow differently from her.
“I believe sharing my experience will teach her better than all the Dos and Don’t’s that I was given when I was growing up,” Sally tells BBC Africa.
When Sally was 18 and at the institute, she got pregnant by her boyfriend. They were sexually active without any idea of how to protect themselves. The only option was to get an abortion as advised by your friends. Because he could not afford the abortion fee, she had to sleep with more men to get the money. When he was going to do abortion, the approaching pharmacist said he would have sex with her so that the procedure was not painful. At the end of the procedure, Sally was happy that he would end when he saw blood in his panties, which meant that the process was successful. After seven days of being at home, Sally's father had to take her to the hospital for the proper treatment. Fortunately, the nurse that attended her adhered to the ethics of her career being confidential with Sally's information. To confirm if she can still have children, Sally quickly married. Curiously, she married the man responsible for pregnancy that he aborted, and with him, he had three girls and a boy.
“I just had to let it out. It’s a secret that you have to share to make it better. I’m struggling to make it up to my self first, to other girls and to change the narrative,” Sally said.
For Sally’s 18-year old daughter, she still sees her mother as a strong woman considering all she must have gone through at the time.
Sally does not regret telling her story as she believes that “a story shared might hurt when you tell it but the lessons behind it can save generations.”
Watch her talk about her story here
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